saltunderthesea:

10knotes:

newyearnewhummus:

HEY LITTLE GUY IF ANYBODY EVER TELLS U UR DUMB DNT BELIVE THEM BC U GRADUATED I COULDN’T EVEN DO THAT GOOD JOB LIL ANIMAL

HELP

dottyasyouplease:

that tree looks so happy that it is receiving a hug from this child

dottyasyouplease:

that tree looks so happy that it is receiving a hug from this child

©

novacorps:

Date someone who looks at you the way Mark Ruffalo looks at Paul Rudd.

novacorps:

Date someone who looks at you the way Mark Ruffalo looks at Paul Rudd.

tropicalfruitbabe:

*doesn’t check bank account*
*pretends everything is fine*

kyubiisaan:

lowwbloods:

officialwillowpape:

i searched up ‘hurdlers without hurdles’ on google and i dont regret it

these boots are made for walkin

The ol razzle dazzle

kyubiisaan:

lowwbloods:

officialwillowpape:

i searched up ‘hurdlers without hurdles’ on google and i dont regret it

these boots are made for walkin

The ol razzle dazzle

totallynotagentphilcoulson:

malformalady:

McDonald’s has been forced to open its first ever restaurant with a turquoise coloured sign after city planners said the signature yellow sign would be too garish. Officials in Sedona, Arizona told the fast-food giant they were unable to open a restaurant with the trademark yellow logo.This is due to the city’s strict regulations which prevent buildings from ruining the picturesque view of the desert.
Photo credit: Michael Wright/WENN.com

that looks really cool actually

totallynotagentphilcoulson:

malformalady:

McDonald’s has been forced to open its first ever restaurant with a turquoise coloured sign after city planners said the signature yellow sign would be too garish. Officials in Sedona, Arizona told the fast-food giant they were unable to open a restaurant with the trademark yellow logo.This is due to the city’s strict regulations which prevent buildings from ruining the picturesque view of the desert.

Photo credit: Michael Wright/WENN.com

that looks really cool actually

soft-communism:

hot-elf-librarian:

itaqueen:

anarchoskeleton420:

amphigoryglory:

Trudy!

Why my dog makin rounds again

because she cute

soft-communism

❤☮☭folloш foя мoяе soft сoммцпisм☭☮❤

soft-communism:

hot-elf-librarian:

itaqueen:

anarchoskeleton420:

amphigoryglory:

Trudy!

Why my dog makin rounds again

because she cute

soft-communism

❤☮☭folloш foя мoяе soft сoммцпisм☭☮❤

commandersheena:

israfel070:

modestdemidov:

"make up is false advertisement!"

translation:

"i view women as products"

If you went on a few dates with a charming, fit-looking guy, decided to invite him upstairs, and after he took off his shirt he unstrapped a hidden girdle and his massive gelatinous kegbelly rippled forth, you would be pissed too.

did you really just compare a woman putting some powder on her face to a guy literally reshaping his entire body

mintypineapple:

Beautiful.

egobus:

omg my little brother was using my computer and look at his search history

image

so embarrassing

killuangel:

"it’s like freud always said," says the ‘psychologist’ character in the movie, making everyone in the audience who knows anything at all about psychology flinch involuntarily

kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails

sisterjudyjudybobudy:

weetbixgod:

hotdadcalendar:

I’m actually concerned for boys who complain about how different girls look without makeup. Like did you think eyeshadow permanently alters a girls eyelid? Are you frightened when people change clothes

Babies have no concept of object permanence

That’s one of the sickest burns I’ve ever read.